April 16, 1999 fun

Signs that you have hired the wrong COM developer…

  • Keeps referring to interfaces as Thingies”.
  • Insists that migrating to NT5.0 is a bad idea because the going rate for a rental-threaded apartment is $640.00 a month plus utilities.
  • Comes into work one morning dressed as a cowboy and claiming to be The new marshaller in town”.
  • Wants to know how to tune his TV to the RPC Channel”.
  • Stands up in design meetings, grabs his crotch, and proclaims Yo! Marshall this! Am I right?”.
  • Names one of his interfaces IKnown” and claims that any object that doesn’t implement it is doomed to eventually fall victim to a COM Identity Crisis”.
  • Spends 2 hours in front of a whiteboard trying to prove that by taking the integral of the GUID generating function, one can discern the total surface area of the application’s UI in pixels.
  • Pronounces GUID as gooeey dee”.


Here’s a picture of the t-shirt that Microsoft produced for their 1999 Dallas TechEd that leverages Tony’s idea without giving him credit, asking him permission or even notifying him. You lawyers should be able to support you in your retirement with this one, Tony!

BTW, here’s one more sign that you’ve hired the wrong COM programmer (do you think CAT scans will become a normal part of the interview process?):

Anthony Toivonen
Fri 4/16/99 1:07 PM
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